I Drown in Your Ocean of Grace

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." - Phil. 4:6-7 (NIV)

Although I have not finished going through the entire Bible, I would like to say that, for the mean time, Philippians is my favorite book. :) I would now like to take back what I've said the first time I read Philippians, that Paul's only putting up a brave front, that deep inside he's really suffering. Now I see and realize that he's not doing that just so he could mask his pain - whether or not he truly had any - but that Paul had an honest fondness for the Philippians. I see that now. I see how much he cares for them, how much he loves them. 

Considering the situation I'm in right now - and since I don't really know who's reading this blog, I shall not state just what kind of situation that is here - I really needed this. I want that peace, I want to feel as though my life makes sense again, that I'm still the same person my parents raised me to be. This is such a comfort for me. I guess it's the most basic and common things about our relationship with God that I forget the most - just pray. Talk and he'll listen, ask with thanksgiving and receive with a grateful heart. 

If for some reason, during a talk with a friend things seemed blurred to me, it's all so very clear now - distinct. I know exactly what I should do, and I pray I don't lose sight of it. I'd really like to think this is God answering me, talking to me; that it's not just me relying on my own again. I personally took this as Paul's reminder to me, "Whateveryou have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me - put it into practice. And the GOD OF PEACE will be with you." (Phil. 4:9) 

I am very much encouraged by this, after feeling semi-lousy this afternoon. God, you truly are amazing. 

Heavenly Father, 

Thank You Lord for today, the first day of the second semester, of seeing my friends again and having that one special talk with Your beautiful daughter. I think I needed that, to realize it and to stop looking at things through rose tinted glasses. I've never been an addict and I don't want to start now. Father, just please be with me. I need Your counsel Lord, I need You. I need to rely on You, Lord. Father, I lift everything up to You, my concerns with this certain issue. Father may You always be in my every thought and may every decision I make may be considered Godly and have Your approval, Lord. Father, please never tire of reminding me that I've surrendered my life to You, and as such have completely given over the control of my life to You. Lord, just please let Your will work in my life, let me have the courage to confront my anxieties. 

I love you Lord. Never let me stop from falling deeper in love with You.

In Christ's Name,

Amen