I've got so many things to say, so many things that I've done, and so many things that have happened to me since the last time I posted here - which was almost a month ago.
I guess, because January started with a bit of drama, things after that were a bit of a roller coaster ride. It was just a couple of weeks ago that things are starting to be normal and steady again. So many things to be thankful for, so many days that God consistently made His love for me truly felt. And because I don't want this post to be as long as a novel, I'll just make a compressed-summary-and-bullet-points-rundown of events.
1. Relationship with my brother - This is appropriately at the top of the things that I'm grateful for. My brother and I technically never had a bad relationship - I actually think that he's the one who understands me most at home. It was never bed, but I'm still thankful that our relationship grew over the past month. The thing is, at least in our family, we're not used to talking about really personal stuff with each other. So the fact that my brother confides in me about his life is something I find that I actually enjoy hearing. That and we're making baby steps towards the right direction, I think. We even give each other awkward hugs now. Ehe.
2. Band 3's week - The weeks before we were supposed to be leading worship, I was actually debating whether I should join the band for that time. I was feeling particularly hormonal and I felt that my heart wasn't really ready. I felt that I was going through this unwanted emotional turmoil and leading worship on my part would have just been a way for me to escape these turmoils. But God was so gracious that the week before we were supposed to lead, He gave me the peace and the reassurance that I needed. He also gave me the courage to accept responsibilities that I otherwise would have shied away from. [Side note, but something I'm equally grateful for, my childhood crush played drums for our band and all of a sudden, I felt like the cliched school girl that turns red at the sight of her crush]
3. Revelations - In one sentence: I am thankful that despite having read the same passages that I have before, I'm still learning more about God. I'm thankful for the Holy Spirit and for the realizations that it has helped me come up with. Affirming realizations. Just as what Pastor BJ used to tell us, we can only really pinpoint God's faithfulness in our lives in hindsight, and looking back at all the things that I've had to go through, it's the only time that I can truly say how faithful, gracious, and good God really is.
4. Being in CDE - Every time I go to class, I am affirmed that it's the path that God wants me to be in. And to think I didn't even want to be in UA&P in the first place. I thank God for placing me here, for making it clear for me that this is what I should be doing, how I can best serve Him.
There ends my list. I'll add another one at the end of this week - depending on how it goes. :)) P&F, here we go!
