I've had friends who've told me that sometimes when something unexpected happens to them, natural reaction to the situation would kick in. Eventually however, as they told me, they would realize soon after that it wasn't too bad because God had prepared them for those situations.
I am blessed to say that God has prepared me for an unexpected encounter last night with How he's been talking to me the past few days.
Day 51: Wednesday
Wednesdays are usually pretty laid back for me. Because it's the University's "free day", I spend most of my Wednesdays at home, do some school work - but mostly catch up on some much needed rest, and have an early morning time spend with God. And it just feels so good when God is speaking to me clearly. That very distinct kilig feeling because He's talking to me.
"But have you any right to be angry?" -- Jonah 4:4
It was just something that really struck me. For a few months now, I've stopped considering that I'm still mad or angry - at him or at the situation. I certainly never thought that I was over it - I still don't think that I'm over it. But I thought that I've already gone past the angry stage. But as I've come to realize, just because I'm not raging every few minutes, or just because the desire to inflict the same kind of pain on him is gone, does not mean that I'm not mad at him or at the situation anymore.
Sometimes, something as simple as bitterness can still account for being mad - and certainly something that the devil would be able to use and spur on so that I would get insanely angry again. It's a dangerous thing, this bitterness. But the reason why that verse struck me so much is because I know that I really don't have much of a right to be mad. Yes, he hurt me but that doesn't mean I had no fault in the situation as well. I went against God's wishes so of course there are going to be repercussions, and I need to deal with the consequences.
Besides, getting mad will not help anyone. So I might as well just stop and move on right?
Day 52: Thursday
Just this Thursday, the University's School of Education had its incorporation rites and the Education students had to dress up for the event. Well, it wasn't a formal event, but I had to wear a skirt - and it's the second time that I've worn a skirt to school.
To be honest, it wasn't that spectacular or anything. It was an event that formally inducted us into the SED family, and for the most part, we all had fun. And I just thank God for constantly affirming me that I am in the right course. That night just got me thinking that even though there's not a lot of money in teaching, the financial returns really isn't something that concerns me - I mean, I know that when the time comes, God will provide. In a way, it was fun as well - it was a gathering of people who are ready and happy to serve.
Thank You Lord for putting me this desire to teach and to make a difference.
Day 53: Friday
Yesterday was the birthday of one of my closest friends in college. Somehow though, we weren't able to have a big celebration for her. I mean, we gave her cards and greetings and stuff, but somehow it didn't feel like we made her feel more appreciated on her special day. I do hope though that we made her feel loved enough yesterday.
It was actually a pretty good day yesterday. Went to all my classes, and especially enjoyed the discussion we had for Developmental Psychology yesterday. Topic? Birth Order. And so yesterday, I just realized that I really don't fit the characteristics of the last-born. Interestingly, I fit in on the first-born category more. Or maybe I just really dislike being the youngest in the family? Goodness, I really don't know. :))
After class, I went straight to church for band rehearsals. So, we have more guest band members than actual band 3 members and for what seemed like the first time ever, there were more boys than girls in the band room yesterday. :)) I also had to lead the band devotionals last night, and because Jonah 4 had a huge impact on me, it's the passage that I decided to share last night. I usually get nervous for it, but yesterday, I was just really excited to share what God has been telling me. :)
Speaking of Jonah 4:4, just before I led devos last night, Strong stopped by with Matt at the band room. I've said before that we're trying to be civil with each other right? Well lately, it just feels like I'm the one that's just trying to be polite and civil with him. What I realized last night, when neither of us said hi or whatever, that I can try being polite and civil all I want. But in the end, I'm just going to get frustrated. Ang bastos lang kasi. Babatiin mo tapos wala. I mean, I'm making an effort here. But eh. I resolved with myself last night that if he really doesn't want to, then I'll be fine with it. I mean, I'm through with making a fool out of myself.
And I just thank God for the speaking to me last Wednesday and preparing me for that unexpected encounter with Strong last night. It would have been really easy to get mad and bothered last night, but somehow, I just felt like I'm getting used to it already. :)
Lala. Keep calm and keri lang. My God is in control, He is with me. And that's enough for me.
Sometimes, something as simple as bitterness can still account for being mad - and certainly something that the devil would be able to use and spur on so that I would get insanely angry again. It's a dangerous thing, this bitterness. But the reason why that verse struck me so much is because I know that I really don't have much of a right to be mad. Yes, he hurt me but that doesn't mean I had no fault in the situation as well. I went against God's wishes so of course there are going to be repercussions, and I need to deal with the consequences.
Besides, getting mad will not help anyone. So I might as well just stop and move on right?
Day 52: Thursday
Just this Thursday, the University's School of Education had its incorporation rites and the Education students had to dress up for the event. Well, it wasn't a formal event, but I had to wear a skirt - and it's the second time that I've worn a skirt to school.
To be honest, it wasn't that spectacular or anything. It was an event that formally inducted us into the SED family, and for the most part, we all had fun. And I just thank God for constantly affirming me that I am in the right course. That night just got me thinking that even though there's not a lot of money in teaching, the financial returns really isn't something that concerns me - I mean, I know that when the time comes, God will provide. In a way, it was fun as well - it was a gathering of people who are ready and happy to serve.
Thank You Lord for putting me this desire to teach and to make a difference.
Day 53: Friday
Yesterday was the birthday of one of my closest friends in college. Somehow though, we weren't able to have a big celebration for her. I mean, we gave her cards and greetings and stuff, but somehow it didn't feel like we made her feel more appreciated on her special day. I do hope though that we made her feel loved enough yesterday.
It was actually a pretty good day yesterday. Went to all my classes, and especially enjoyed the discussion we had for Developmental Psychology yesterday. Topic? Birth Order. And so yesterday, I just realized that I really don't fit the characteristics of the last-born. Interestingly, I fit in on the first-born category more. Or maybe I just really dislike being the youngest in the family? Goodness, I really don't know. :))
After class, I went straight to church for band rehearsals. So, we have more guest band members than actual band 3 members and for what seemed like the first time ever, there were more boys than girls in the band room yesterday. :)) I also had to lead the band devotionals last night, and because Jonah 4 had a huge impact on me, it's the passage that I decided to share last night. I usually get nervous for it, but yesterday, I was just really excited to share what God has been telling me. :)
Speaking of Jonah 4:4, just before I led devos last night, Strong stopped by with Matt at the band room. I've said before that we're trying to be civil with each other right? Well lately, it just feels like I'm the one that's just trying to be polite and civil with him. What I realized last night, when neither of us said hi or whatever, that I can try being polite and civil all I want. But in the end, I'm just going to get frustrated. Ang bastos lang kasi. Babatiin mo tapos wala. I mean, I'm making an effort here. But eh. I resolved with myself last night that if he really doesn't want to, then I'll be fine with it. I mean, I'm through with making a fool out of myself.
And I just thank God for the speaking to me last Wednesday and preparing me for that unexpected encounter with Strong last night. It would have been really easy to get mad and bothered last night, but somehow, I just felt like I'm getting used to it already. :)
Lala. Keep calm and keri lang. My God is in control, He is with me. And that's enough for me.
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