Running Reflection

Some people say that when they run, it's like they completely forget everything and leave behind - their problems, their burdens. They focus on running, as though the physical aspect of it, makes up for what they can't figuratively do; to escape and run away from their issues and problems. And I get that, I understand it. For some people, running may be the only time they have for themselves.

I have no idea what happened, but I sort of managed to think about what happened last year and reflected on them.

I've whined about it enough to realize that while I was at that point in my life, I didn't appreciate the way that God was moving and shaping my life. All I thought of back then was how unfair everything seemed - how unfair God had seemed. All I could think about was how much I was hurting, how I thought that I could not possibly handle all of it. I thought that I probably was going to be bitter for a very long time.

The entire situation was a test of faith, when I know that I couldn't hold onto anything temporal, God was the only one who I could turn to. Grace is a gift, and faith even more so. And I guess, I just realized that if God was able to handle death on the cross for our sins, then He can do anything else. All these I-centered thoughts that I had were a waste of time. I realized, I should have spent more time thinking about Him and what He can do to me that what I can do to save myself.

Because no matter what people say (especially the feminists), we just cannot be our own Saviors. We can try, but I think we'll just end up frustrating ourselves more.

So yes, the entire drama from last year made me go through some tough refining, but at the end of it, you just come out stronger. And I'd like to think that I grew so much because of it. I actually think that it's funny how that event in my life turned out to be something that I would be grateful to have. :)