Gosh, it's practically been two months since I last updated. But anyway, I just wanted to share something again.
I saw something on my Facebook news feed yesterday, and I guess it was a little more than challenging to wrap my head around it. I don't know. I suppose I'm really not supposed to be surprised about it. But it's something that's definitely will be difficult for me to get used to. It's just that, even when I've moved on and at peace with what God has done in my life, seeing that Mr. Ex is in a relationship with a new girl is, I don't know, something similar to showering with cold water?
I know for a fact that the love that I have for him now is that of love for a brother in Christ. Still. To be honest, it was a bitter pill to swallow - and I've told God this, that I think it's a pride thing. After all, I broke up with him and he ends up being in a relationship sooner than me. I think my competitive side just wanted to come out. Like what I told my best-friend, even though I know that God has intended someone else for me I just wanted us to be in the same "level" in a way that I was good with settling with just having suitors. Heh.
Then I remember what I told my discipler around 2 weeks ago: God doesn't destroy our dreams. Instead of seeing him as a destroyer, we should see him as a safe-keeper. Because He doesn't ruin our dreams or desires just to spite us. He refines them, and keeps them safe, until the time is perfect and God sees that we're ready for it.
Being in a relationship isn't something that should be rushed. What's more is that it's something that shouldn't be pursued in order to get ahead of someone, or treat is as a competition. If and when a person enters a relationship, they should do it first because they love God and that they want to glorify Him through their relationship, and second because they are honest to goodness, sincerely, hopelessly, and madly in love with each other - and that nothing will and should separate them.
As if that little nugget wasn't enough, lyrics from Wicked's For Good popped into my head as well, these lines especially:
I've heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And if we help them in return
So he came into my life, and God knows I've learned lots from the whole mess of things. And I praise God that the way that I see this part of my life now has completely changed. Because even when we did end up hurting each other, I know that I grew both as a person and in my relationship with God.
And that's all that really matters.
